Hi Neighbor,
Breaking free from emotional tentacles tethering me to home is always a challenge. Leaving takes effort even now as an empty nester without children’s embraces keeping me there. Yet, I’ve travelled far and near, for long and short trips.
It’s just so easy to be home. There’s part of me that would never leave. I like the dependable routines, sharing space with my husband and dogs, knowing where everything is (most of the time), the feelings of being safe, warm and content. And of course, it’s where so many memories are replayed on the movie projector of my mind.
Yet another part of me happily agrees to travel planning again. It’s challenging and exciting. It requires the now familiar process of reminding myself to let go of the safe, routine and comfortable. It requires courage to travel, as Hermann Hesse wrote,”…taking the step into uncertainty.” Leaving requires challenging myself to break free from home’s embrace and to take that step. More wisdom from Hermann Hesse: “Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go.”
Confirming plans and especially the week prior, I feel guilt leaving the dogs and reluctance at changing the schedule I rely on, especially my exercise routine and music practice. Knowing that returning means mail and newspapers to wade through, more laundry and work deadlines, I remind myself that ultimately change is good. I vow to go with the flow.
When I’m away, it’s a changed routine, an opportunity to explore, to learn, to revisit our relationship with new eyes from a new perspective. I’m so grateful though, to re-enter the welcoming familiarity of the spaces that are the container of my existence, greeted by doggie exuberance.
Leaving a newly explored destination behind, there are no regrets. No thoughts of relocating. I’m delighted to be back. I happily re-discover, like Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, there’s no place like home.
Happy returns,
Jane
July 18th Newsletter
Jane – you have encapsulated my very thoughts and emotions – there is “no place like home” for all the very reasons you have listed! After 47 years in a home I adore surrounded with now mature gardens I have designed and nurtured, I have reached the point in my life when ’tis time to be thinking of and deciding on ‘the next step’, known as a ‘retirement community’ … so difficult to anticipate
View moreJane – you have encapsulated my very thoughts and emotions – there is “no place like home” for all the very reasons you have listed! After 47 years in a home I adore surrounded with now mature gardens I have designed and nurtured, I have reached the point in my life when ’tis time to be thinking of and deciding on ‘the next step’, known as a ‘retirement community’ … so difficult to anticipate leaving all that is so dear to me! Thank you for describing “home” so beautifully!
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